Monday, December 27, 2004
diaNe...the dReaMer
shit! i visited my sister's blog yesterday and i was like...tentenenen!: INSPIRED! leche ka sis! *now words that i don't usually use are coming out of my mouth...este hands...like i'm some crazy lunatic...whoops! redundant na naman...*
ANG PANAGINIP...BOW!
Dreams...panaginip sa Tagalog. Halos lahat sa atin ay nananaginip. Iba't ibang version pa nga 'yan eh. Perhaps you have experienced at least one. May mga nananaginip nang nakapikit. Yung tipong tulog ka tapos bigla ka na lang makakakita ng mga eksenang tipong totoo pero hindi pala. Labo ano?! But, do you know that we only dream when we are in the REM stage of sleep? Yun kasi yung natutunan ko sa Psych 101 ko. Ano kamo yung REM? That's the last stage of sleep...tipong pag pinilit mong buksan ang mata ng isang taong nasa stage na 'yon ay makikita mo ang kanyang eyeballs na parang may sariling buhay at galaw nang galaw. (Uy, susubukan na niya mamaya...)
Meron ding nananaginip ng gising. Mahirap 'yon. Imaginin mo...dilat ka tapos nananaginip ka. Baka pagkamalan ka pang schizophrenic. Yikes! Madalas itong makita sa mga classroom...obserbahan mo na lang yung katabi mo, ok?!
May isa pang version ang panaginip pero mas applicable sa English eh. Ito naman yung madalas kong marinig nung bata pa ako..."What is your dream when you grow up?" Really...tinanong ako dati nang ganon. Kung tatanga-tanga ka eh aakalain mong pinapa-predict yung magiging panaginip mo paglaki mo...ehehe! Ano ako ngayon...manghuhula?! Mali nga naman kasi yung tanong...gawin na lang nating simple ano?! "What is your ambition?" Siguro pwede na 'yan...
Siguro marami pang ibang version ng panaginip pero 'yan na muna ang isusulat ko...hindi naman kasi 'yan ang gusto kong pagtuunan ng pansin ngayon...
Eh kasi naman, hindi ko akalaing mabuti rin pala ang mga panaginip ko habang tulog ako. Isa na ako sa mga taong may makukulay na panaginip. More often than not, I remember my dreams clearly. In that way, they serve different purposes.
1. Dreams as reviewers
Sabihin niyo nang obsessed sa pag-aaral pero minsan, nakakapag-review ako sa panaginip. Madalas 'tong mangyari if may parating na exam. Hindi ko alam if may relasyon toh sa paglalagay ng mga notes ko sa ilalim ng unan.
2. Dreams as reminders of history
Yep! Nasubukan niyo na bang managinip tungkol kay Rizal o kung ano pa tungkol sa kasaysayan? Ano'ng say niyo? Ako nanaginip ako tungkol kay Andres Mabini...ang tanga noh?! Eion, gumising ako...ang tanga diba?!
3. Dreams as realizations
Dati, insecure ako sa aking boobs (bulgaran na talaga). But I've become used to it na eh. Ashus! Mahirap naman 'pag malaki diba...pansinin na nga ako ngayon...paano pa kaya pag malaki ang aking "hinaharap"? =P Nung kelan lang eh na-realize ko na baka repressed lang yung desire ko for bigger boobs...eh kasi nanaginip ako na nagpa-breast lift daw ako. Nyark! Kainis ha...Ang nangyari pa sa dream ko (na sobrang vivid) eh hindi pantay yung boobs ko. Shucks! Ang pangit tuloy. From then on, I promised myself not to ever desire for bigger boobs. I'm very much contented...tenksyu!!!
4. Dreams as alarm clocks
Dreams as alarm clocks...bilang panggising. Tipong magigising ka na lang 'pag may kakaiba nang nangyayari. Minsan, bangungot na pala. Buti na lang at kahit ang hilig kong kumain bago matulog eh hindi pa ako namamatay sa bangungot *knocks on wood*. Buti na lang at hindi masyadong prone ang mga babaeng tulad ko sa mga bangungot na 'yan. Tsaka may scientific and medical basis naman siguro 'yan diba?!
5. Dreams as premonitions
Alam niyo ba yung kasabihang 'pag nanaginip ka na nabunutan ka ng ngipin eh may mamamatay na kakilala mo? Eh kasi nangyari na 'yan sa 'kin...Lima pa nga ata yung nabunot. Ayun...may namatay na kamag-anak...lola ko ata 'yon. Swerte rin daw yung managinip ka ng tae...pati ata ahas. Hindi pa naman ako nananaginip nang ganon.
Ayon...shini-share ko lang yung mga panaginip ko. I have the luxury of sleeping 8 hours a day kasi lalo pa't holiday...enjoy lang ako sa kakapanaginip. Kaya lang minsan may mga distorbo gaya ng mga current sleepmates ko - Papa and Cathe, mga aso sa labas, at mga pesteng sasakyan sa labas.
Anyway...it's bed time once again...and off to bed I shall go...
Enjoy dreaming!
| nadZ went splisha-splashing at 11:07 pm
bRRR...migRatE and hiBerNaTe
now...i'm really wondering the capacity of the human mind...
birds migrate...frogs hibernate...now, what should we humans do?
the weather's really weird...it can get hot during daytime and very cold at night...
i'm freezing...brrr! the blankets can't help me...i'm craving for hot choco but my dad had just put the car inside the garage...therefore, he's lazy to get it out again and we can't go out for food...
i'm looking forward to more shopping *hopefully tomorrow*...i have to buy those flats at shang...or should i settle for the pink poncho? or the pants at NBW?
i'm turning into a shopaholic...i so love the holidays (especially the pesos and the $)...
i wonder why the cash counters don't have their usual "kring!" whenever transactions are made? i kinda miss it...
| nadZ went splisha-splashing at 1:19 am
Friday, December 24, 2004
giFt wRappiNg liKe cRazy...
just wishing myself a merry christmas...despite the fact that my mom's not here with us to celebrate it...
the house is really quiet...i busied myself with texting about a hundred people in my phonebook...i reconnected with old friends and they were like "who's this?"...hehe! ;)
am so excited to hand out the small packages of sweets that i prepared for the kids who'll come by tomorrow...i hope they like it...syempre, i tasted it already...^_^ i just wish i wake up early for tomorrow...
oh...and i wanna share that i've been crazy wrapping presents eversince my dad bought the gift wrappers yesterday...i wrapped all the gifts by myself...i refused to be helped...my hands are itching right now for more gifts to wrap...wala na ba?!;)
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!
| nadZ went splisha-splashing at 5:00 pm
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
ChRisTmaS maYheM
Yey! Am finally back...
I was kinda busy with the Christmas preparations...I am still...but before all that, I took my much needed rest; hence, I still haven't studied for my exams next year...oh well, I have to enjoy the Christmas break *no matter what!*.
I found myself to be emotional lately. My mom's not celebrating Christmas with us this year. Haay...Pressure ito. And now, me, my sis, and my dad have to do all the Christmas preparations by ourselves.
We started our Christmas shopping last Sunday. Buti naman! We haven't finished our Christmas shopping that day, but we found good gifts at a bazaar in SM Megamall. Ang hirap na talagang mamili ng gifts ngayon. Ang daming considerations - likability, functionality, and price. Hate ko talaga 'pag price na yung pinag-uusapan. It's such a big deal nowadays.
I also attended the Simbang Gabi masses...but I missed one. Kainis kasi...Bad trip talaga ako. Nag-away kasi kami ng sis ko. I was thinking of not attending the anticipated mass that night. Kahiya naman kay Lord. Anyway, I did prepare to attend mass. Ok na sana ang lahat, but the car won't start. As in! Malas ko talaga. I tried fixing the car. Bad trip uli kasi nagmamadali yung kapatid ko at yung kapitbahay namin. Eh di bahala sila. I didn't join them that night. 'Pag nagdadala ako ng kotse eh nakikisabay tapos 'pag nagpapahintay ako ng saglit eh nang-iiwan...Kainis diba? Later that night, I found out that the car was just on it's safety mode. The last one who used it (probably my uncle) didn't put it in the Parking gear (whatever you call it) so the car automatically won't start. Nadumihan pa yung kamay ko tapos yun lang pala yung problema. Lagot talaga yung uncle ko pagdating niya...;) Nanood din ako ng movie that night so I wasn't able to attend the 4am mass...I was sleepy eh...
SPLURGE DAY YESTERDAY! My sis and I went to Rob Galleria (commuting via public transport) for the first time. As in hindi pa kami sure sa mga sinasakyan namin. Luckily, we arrived at Galleria safe and sound. We did some more Christmas shopping. Ate at Auntie Anne's. Bought something from my Christmas Wishlist - the havaianas in the pix...kaya lang green siya eh. Naikot ata namin yung Galle sa kakahanap ng havaianas na 'yan...ang sakit tuloy ng paa ko...Buti na lang at meron kahit papaano sa Chocolate (with emphasis on cho-CO-late). After that, we did more shopping and visited Robinsons Cainta/Junction, Sta. Lucia East Grand Mall, and Robinsons Place Metro East. Ang saya noh?!
So there you go...the best thing about all that? My sister and I still had the time to attend mass at around 9:30 pm...medyo late nga lang...but I still miss the puto bumbong. I'm planning to wake up early sometime to buy puto bumbong...wala kasi dito malapit sa church...o baka hindi ko pa nakikita...dilim kasi...hehe!;)
ON FPJ: Wala lang...he was buried *finally* today. Napuyat ako ha...sa kakapanood ng news kaninang madaling araw. My dad was even late for work today. I was planning to give an envelope tonight...FOR THE SOUL OF FPJ...ano kayang reaction ng mga tao sa simbahan? heehee!^_^ Hindi pa tinatanggap ni sis yung dare eh...I also plan to write FROM: K. NADAL...kalokohan talaga...wag na lang...magalit pa si God. Enaco, sumisikat yang si Kitchie ha...ok naman yung songs niya pero inis talaga ako...ikaw ba naman ang laging tanungin kung kamag-anak mo 'yon...haay! Wag na wag mong sasabihin!!!
Sige na nga muna...gtg...
Ciao!;)
| nadZ went splisha-splashing at 3:22 pm
Friday, December 17, 2004
fRusTraTioNs...
i dread facing the computer...
i hate the last week of classes this year...
talk about being HECTIC...i guess that's an understatement.
i felt like i was drugged (although i haven't really experienced it for real)...i slept for a maximum of 3 hours...sleeping was a luxury i craved...i had trouble recognizing what's real from fiction...i felt like i was dreaming the whole time...that didn't feel right.
it all started out last friday...or maybe days before that...but i chose friday...
at 10 o'clock in the morning, i was done with school...after my socsci 2 class, i rushed to get my bio12 plates and physics recit and submitted my article for the UNESCO UPD newsletter. i was dressed nicely, but my feet hurt...i was wearing high-heeled shoes, a deviation from my usual flats...i wasn't prepared for the brisk walking i had to face that day...and to top it all of, i slept late the night before...we went to the Kiwanis christmas party...the mayor was there...and guess what? i was sleeping on the couch...tadah!
at 11 am, me and 4 of my female groupmates at pscyh 118 were off to the Lopez Museum in Ortigas...it was field research day...i finally had experienced riding the MRT and LRT1 that day. we ate lunch at megamall, walked (and lost our way) going to the museum, J-walked (you won't understand it), and arrived at the museum safe and sound...luckily, the weather was nice...
the museum tour was fine, but it was so cold...by the time we went back to megamall, i felt sick and started coughing...we rode the FX up to quiapo...i slept...then i started getting cranky...
i told you i felt sick...and tired.
imagine...
you are so tired from all the walking...you are starting to feel blisters in your feet...you are in busy quiapo...an unknown land...you are not mentally and psychologically prepared for the experience (even if you went there just a couple of weeks ago)...your friends wanted to go shopping for pirated DVDs...you are forced to join them even if you don't want to...you are outnumbered...you don't want to be left alone...
you are definitely a stranger...it's recognizable...people watch you...you seem like an alien in a different planet...just look at you...from the way you dress to the way you look at the people and places around you...you long for your friends to finish shopping, but it seems like it's going to take them so long...the sun is slowly setting...damn! would they please hurry up?
you start to argue with yourself...everything will be over if can just find the stand that sells 4 DVDs for a hundred pesos...dilemma: where was that place? two of your friends already bought DVDs...but they were not a bargain...damn! they went all the way here to buy a DVD for a minimum of 60 pesos? you could buy a similar one at a convenient place...not here in dirty and busy quiapo. frustration. anger slowly starts to seep in. one of your friend who suggested shopping for DVDs didn't bought a single DVD...what the?!?! more frustration.
you finally left the place. silent. angry. frustrated. tired. sweaty...a li'l bit. cranky. you walked a long way up to the recto station of LRT 1. drunk people stalked you. people started calling you. leche! you climbed the wrong flight of stairs...you went down and crossed the street. the right station was on the other side. the train was full. you hated that. geesh! crowded places make you feel sick.
when you finally arrived at Robinsons Manila, you felt like talking to your friends, but didn't feel like it. they were curious about you not smiling. how could you smile if you're tired and frustrated? you can't tell them how you feel...you still have to spend the rest of the night with them...too risky. they thought you were hungry...so you went to wendy's to eat. you don't like wendy's. you didn't feel like complaining. you ate a cheap meal of chili rice. it was fine. the only male groupmate you have arrived...he should have joined us at quiapo...you would have felt more secured. after eating, you all went to the CR. you washed your face. *snap!*
you woke up...
do you get it now? later on, at around 8pm, we started walking to Malate...our project's area of research. it meant more walking. we divided ourselves into 3 pairs and each pair had to walk 3 streets in Malate. i had to walk at bocobo, adriatico, and mabini with krystel. it was tiring. i had to count the cigarette butts on the streets while krystel had to count the noncommercial houses and listen to the language used by the people we saw conversing at the streets. i was doubtful about the subject on noncommercial houses...and as it turned out, our final paper about that was wrong, according to our professor...hmph! sana pinakinggan nila ako when i told them about noncommercial houses not being evidence of erosion.
anyway, the three streets were all long...some even had some sort of squatter's area so we had to ditch those parts...scary...more stalkers for me.
my feet and throat hurts after all that walking...
then we headed for starbucks at adriatico...buti naman! we started brainstorming for our project. i thought everything will be done at around 12 am...so i asked my dad to fetch us (coz some wanted to hitch a ride) at the gasoline station at mabini cor. quirino ave....none of my groupmates came with me, fyi. kainis! anyway, i felt relieved din...finally, rest time.
but then, i had to wake up early the next day for a meeting at ivy's house. i was tired and i felt like sleeping the whole day...thanks to the cold weather...i woke up late and arrived at ivy's at around 10:30...2 and a half hour late...that was so not me...
we, dean, ivy, and I, started shooting...and ended at around 10pm...buti na lang ok yung food kina ivy...hehe!=P
then, the next day, sunday, i had to go to ivy's house again to do some editing. we could not have it edited someplace else. it was both our first time to do the editing so we finished it at around 10:30 pm...the final product was fine but not totally a first class movie project...what do you expect?
monday...tuesday...i just did a paper for psych 118...krystel insisted on a sleepover at her place. i was not up for it. bakit ba ang hilig niya sa sleepovers (at her place ha...)?! i felt like sleeping instead. we just finished the paper at her house the next day. it went fine naman.
wednesday...rest day! yipee! but i had to buy a kris kringle gift for barre...so i went with my mom to rob that night...hirap mamili ng gift ha...i didn't go to the UNESCO xmas party because i was so tired and i hate to miss the simbang gabi that night...i want to complete the simbang gabi...baka sakaling matupad yung hiling ko...
thursday...inis...may bio classes pa rin ako...to think of it, it was supposed to be vacation already. i got gifts from ivy, dean, and frances (she picked for the pugad kris kringle)...we ate cello's doughnuts which jL bought for us... i missed seeing the "handog" at phan. i missed the oblation run...first time to miss it this year...
but i got to watch the lantern parade for the first time...hindi lang ako makasigaw...my voice is still precious...baka mawala pa ng tuluyan...pero ang ganda ha...especially that of the fine arts studes...they really deserve to be exempted...or else they'll keep on winning...give chance to others naman...;)
so there goes my thursday...my sis and i went to buy 3 dozen doughnuts at cello's...we ate dinner at cabalen since my aunt and unc from canada are here...
my savings are on the rise...nice christmas, i must say...
but my mom went with my aunt and unc to the prov...she won't be here for christmas...sayang! kainis din...
i still am not in my christmas spirit...sabi ko nga kay ivy, para akong si scrooge...kulang na lang eh bisitahin ako ng ghost of xmas past, present and future...
i still haven't done my christmas shopping...eto na naman...rush hour pa naman.
***
christmas woes...
i am slowly starting to be less of an antisocial...
i've gained new friends from psych...
but i miss the orgasm kada...sked problems...
i miss my bestfriend...priority: acads and chris...don't wanna argue with that...
now i know how it really feels to genuinely miss people...
now i know how it feels to truly belong and still feel alone...
i can't explain my feelings right now. confusing eh...
nagtatampo ako...naiinis...nalulungkot...
thanks to my new found friends...miss the old ones...i sincerely hope to see you around soon...bonding session naman...
merry christmas to me...
| nadZ went splisha-splashing at 8:42 pm
Sunday, December 05, 2004
xMaS wisHliSt
Yeah...Christmas is just around the corner and I've thought of doing my own wishlist (not necessarily in order). I just hope someone gives me at least one of these things I've posted. I'll inform you when I open my presents. ^_^
Oh...these are all material things. I'll pray for the intangible ones during the Simbang Gabi. God is so powerful. I have this feeling he'll grant those other "presents". ;)
***
1. XDA II...Eversince I've heard about it last semester, I haven't stopped imagining what it feels like if I have one. I can just see myself using it *hopefully* soon. Damn! It's such a splurge. I doubt it if my very practical father will give me one *crosses fingers*.
2. A black car...This one's just way overdue. My dad promised me a car for my 18th birthday if I met his condition. I'm already 19 and still waiting.
3. A laptop...I do hope I get this one (at least). I really need it for my class presentations. I think this one's negotiable...as well as the LCD. My dad's thinking of business here.
4. My own condo...Ok. OA na. I have to wait for like 10 years pa siguro.
5. Panties...I love panties. I love the hipster and boycut ones. I love the colorful variety. No t-back and thongs. I have already outgrown them.
6. Gym membership...I'm getting big already. I need a good exercise.
7. A digicam...I'm a frustrated photographer. A digicam is more convenient for me...although the classic cam is still better.
8. Bags...As in the functional ones. I need bags that I can use for school. They need to be "in" of course.
9. Havaianas...I'm starting to like wearing flip flops to school. I'm thinking of starting my own collection. Care to start my collection? =P
10. A new swimsuit...Ala lang...just for fun.
11. A certificate for an over-all treat in a spa...I want the works. A footspa at least. A body scrub. I just want to relax. Actually, I'm thinking of giving a certificate to my parents for a couple's treat at a spa. Syempre, footspa lang. It's what I can afford eh.
12. A trip to Europe (preferably Paris)...Dream on!
13. A new watch...Not the formal silver/gold watches. Just the funky ones.
14. A new scent...Mauubos na ang aking pabango eh.
15. A T-shirt bra...Preferably seamless...
16. New earrings...I collect them and I'll never grow tired in receiving one, two, three, or more.
17. A new book...I have a long list of books that I want to buy kaya lang the books are so expensive. I'm thinking of having them shipped from UK. I want the Shopaholic variety. I still don't have the Shopaholic and Sister.
18. I'd like to have our house renovated so that we won't be affected by the flash floods in the area. I'm thinking of helicopters and rubber boats, but that, I believe, is a very different matter.
19. A belt? Gosh...outfit ba ito?!
20. New pants and new top...I told you this was a whole outfit. I'm a picky shopper and I just hope I receive good pants and shirt for this christmas. Something in style and something that totally fits me.
***
That's all for now. I can't think of anything else eh. I hope I get a lot of pink stuff. I'm such a shopaholic. Since I haven't saved much because of shopping, I'm thinking of letting others buy the things I want. That's the cheapest alternative right?
| nadZ went splisha-splashing at 8:44 pm
Saturday, December 04, 2004
aCting liKe an aCtRess...
I'm such a lousy actress. Need I prove it? 'Wag na lang...kakahiya.
My sis asked me several times this week as to what I was going to do. Can you just imagine that I spent two non-school days doing a group report? I miss having real vacations from school. That's an overstatement. The last two holidays due to the bad weather can't compensate for real holidays. I didn't rest. I was worried and tired anticipating of flash floods and fallen trees. When I worry, nothing happends. Not that I want something to happen of course.
So you wonder what I told my sis, noh?! I did some shooting. Yep! I did some shooting. Nothing that involved guns and bullets. I did one for my Psych 118 and another for Psych 155. Why does it always have to involve Psych? Wanna hear more about it?
I had one of the lead roles for my Psych 118. I love TV. I dream of being on stage and acting someday...but I just can't do it. I dunno. Something happens when I act. My groupmates say that I did a great job for the presentation. I haven't seen it yet. Gosh! I'll see it (as in the whole edited presentation) for the first time this Tuesday. My classmates will see it. It's for a major class. I'll still see my classmates for another year. Yikes! At least I'll leave a legacy behind. Hope I didn't mess up my image. ^_^
Psych 155 is still unfinished. It was the most exhausting. We are only three in the group. My creative mind is some kinda tired from brainstorming. The presentation's kinda funny. I just can't stop laughing. I don't like the way I look on screen. I'm so not photogenic nor telegenic. I look like Juday already. I better diet. I might get some serious acting job soon. *Quit pushing.*
I wonder what other people see in me that I don't see. Are they making fun of my acting? Ooh...I sense a dissociative disorder soon. No way!
The lights dim. It's totally dark. The curtain's lifted. I act. No one watches. Good. That's better. This show's for me.
| nadZ went splisha-splashing at 11:17 pm
